Here's a phrase I'd never given any thought to five weeks ago: "self-soothing."
I know that new babies don't always sleep, but I didn't realise that I was supposed to read like a hundred books about sleep-training and sleep habits and be able to discuss it knowledgably with other parents.
Also, there are some people who say "why are you whispering?" And I say, because Zaphod's sleeping (say, if I just went into his room to get something) and they say "do you expect to the whole world to stop because your baby's sleeping?" Well, no. THere'll still be police sirens and drunks on Kilburn High Road, but inside our house we can try and pretend it's night.
Once, I was friendly with this woman who (a) only wore her extremely long hair over one shoulder, hanging down over (I think) her right boob, and (b) she could properly sleep anywhere. It was like a party trick: she would sleep on top of someone else in a really loud room and be really really asleep.